Emily’s Journey in Leaving Her Hometown for College!

By my sophomore year of high school, my outlook on life was steeped in ambivalence. Growing up in a rural town, the future felt predictable and unexciting. The next step seemed simple: attend the nearby state college and pursue a practical degree, like teaching or accounting. My future didn’t excite me, but I didn’t know what else to aim for. Then, my sister Julia shattered the invisible glass ceiling that had always loomed over my life. Despite everyone dismissing her as delusional for considering an out-of-state college, let alone a prestigious one, she earned a full-ride scholarship to Stanford. Her achievement made me realize I had never even considered what might lie beyond the narrow path I’d been following. It was the spark I needed to see that I, too, could aim higher.

During my senior year, I summoned every ounce of courage I had and decided to give myself a chance—I committed to applying to colleges out-of-state. Even with the support of my Matriculate advising fellow, the application process felt overwhelming. Without someone to answer all the questions my parents and counselors couldn’t, I can’t imagine how much harder it would have been! One of the biggest challenges, though, was dealing with doubts from those around me—why put so much effort into applications for schools so far away when I could easily secure a full-ride scholarship locally? But I dismissed those concerns, telling myself it wouldn’t matter once I was accepted. I felt getting in would give me the validation I was searching for, that it would make me feel proud of myself and confident about my future. When the acceptances finally rolled in, nothing felt as I’d imagined. Instead of relief and excitement, I was overwhelmed by uncertainty. I found myself procrastinating on choosing which college to attend. Three days before the deposit deadline, the weight of it all hit me. I cried for three days straight. I cried out of fear of leaving behind my home community, which, though I hadn’t fully appreciated until that moment, had always been there to support me as they could.

Amid my uncertainty, I leaned on my community. I called my old Speech and Debate coach, one of the few in our town’s history to go out of state for college. Though he had long since moved away, he was eager to reassure me that the path ahead wasn’t as foreign as it felt. My dad didn’t understand why I wanted to go out of state, but he didn’t try to direct me. He made me feel supported, advising me to do what I thought was best. And my sister, ever the nurturer, urged me not to let fear hold me back from the opportunities ahead.

Once on campus, I quickly realized the real work was just beginning. Without my familiar support system, I was suddenly faced with everything I didn’t know how to do—and had never had to do on my own. Knowing growth would only come if I embraced the unfamiliar, I kept pushing myself even further out of my comfort zone. In one of those first moments, I took a piece of advice straight from TikTok: I walked past an open dorm room where a group of girls had gathered, and trusting the “invitation to make friends” TikTok promised, I forced myself to turn around, walk back, and introduce myself. That simple step led me to the friends who would become my home away from home. With their support, I slowly gained more confidence. I learned practical things, like navigating public transportation—something completely foreign to me as someone who’d only seen buses in movies. Over time, I leaned on my new friends, who shared everything from campus resources to tips on securing free storage space during summer breaks.

As I adapted to this new chapter of life, I began reflecting on how I was changing. I started distinguishing between what I’d been doing out of habit and what I truly wanted to do. Some realizations were relatively trivial (I don’t like mixed nuts; I’d just always eaten them because they were a family favorite). But other realizations were more significant. For example, I found the confidence to express myself through fashion in ways I never felt comfortable doing back home. I’ve learned to embrace my authentic self, and it’s been empowering.

Today, I believe that when an opportunity is in front of me, it’s because it’s meant for me. I’ve also learned that opportunities don’t always feel like one at first. Ultimately, it’s the communities we build along the way that sustain us. Leaving “home” for college means making an intentional effort to maintain ties with family and old friends, just as after graduation, it’s equally important to nurture the friendships that will continue to shape your life.